Diary of a 20-something Nigerian: first day at my new job, anxiety, and wanderlust
It’s Thursday, 31st November 2023. 9:33 am.
I know it’s been a bit of a minute, but here we are, innit?
Nothing particularly interesting has been happening, and maybe that’s a subconscious reason why I haven’t posted all this time.
I’ve mostly been home, living slowly and sleeping and all that.
Also been watching a lot of YouTube and it’s mostly New York City vlogs I see on my home page? Is the universe trying to tell me something because I’m listening loud and clear o.
I want to visit and see what’s really going on there. Some people have likened it to Lagos, and being Lagosian myself, I want to see how close in comparison they are.
Even though I believe nothing can ever really beat the madness that is Lagos, Nigeria.
I’m kind of growing tired of home, I can’t lie.
As much as I love the pace of my life right now and having a routine and all that, I also really crave some change in scenery. I’ve been home since my Lagos and Ibadan trip in July, and because of #that uber-demanding job, and subsequent unemployment, it’s not as if I’ve had the time and the money to travel myself or do something crazy.
This desire isn’t a regular thing for me because I’m 95% a homebody, the remaining 5% just comes out once in a while.
My dream would be for my friends and I to go around the world together. Now that would be a blast.
Where can I go in Nigeria that’s cute and fun and won’t destroy my wallet?
Anyways.
I start my new job tomorrow!
I’m kinda nervous, in both good and bad ways.
Good, because I love writing (the role is predominantly writing — not editing) and I can’t wait to get to work again. It feels like a long dry spell, and I’m ready to start living a bit faster again, especially doing something I love to do.
Also, my new boss seems like a really cool person, unlike those-who-shall-not-be-named, and I feel like just that is going to amp up my productivity.
You know those people that are always saying they can “work under pressure” and all that one thing one thing, I’m so sorry but it’s really not me.
I already put enough pressure on myself to succeed and I’m pretty responsible (if I do say so myself) so I don’t appreciate excessive pressure from external sources.
Like, I will just shut down.
I thrive in slower, measured environments, which is one of the reasons why I think news got bad for me so fast. It is always so hectic. Go go go all the time and I’m just like. Bro, I can’t even breathe?
Anyway, from the questions I asked and the overall vibe, this seems like it will, at the very least, allow me time to breathe and put my feet up once in a while.
Now, bad anxiety because what if my perceptions are off? What if the job is way more difficult than I thought? What if I do badly and get fired? What if the same thing that happened in my last job happens again? What if my boss turns out to be a big douche?
These are kind of irrational but, I mean, anxiety is rarely ever rational. The good thing is just that the good anxiety is more than the bad.
So, alhamdullilah.
Pilates time. I’ll come back tomorrow to tell you guys about how my first day went.
Wish me luck!
It’s Saturday, 2nd of December, 1:32 pm.
So, yesterday was my first day at work.
And it went really well. I mean, as far as first days go.
I got access to my corporate address, spoke to HR a bit — he sounds cool — then had a welcome meeting with my boss.
The meeting was at 3 pm, and I was still on my way back from Jummah at the time, so I started the meeting on my phone with my AirPods, then got home and switched over to my laptop.
Apart from my MTN embarrassing me (my data finished), the call went pretty smoothly (can I just say that Google Meet will forever trump any other virtual meeting service, I’m not sorry), and we mostly spoke about my expectations and his, and the company and my workload and all that.
It’s all looking pretty good, alhamdulillah, let’s hope it stays that way, innit?
They also put out an introductory article about me on the site, and depending on how I feel when I edit this, I might link that here.
I’m kind of shy.
I have my first task already so I’ll be working on that during the week and yeah. It was a pretty good day, I’m grateful.
Today has been one of those days where I feel really slow. Slower than I usually do.
It’s Saturday, a full-body workout day, but I woke up this morning and didn’t feel that movement in my body. Usually, I can push past it and tell my body to get up and get on my mat and do what I have to do, but this time I didn’t even feel the desire to push.
That’s how I knew today was a rest day.
I’m usually really good about staying on schedule with my routines, but once in a while — on days like this — I remember that I’m not a machine, and I can take a day off.
So I’ll do that tomorrow.
But as much as I wasn’t feeling a full workout today, I’ve also become that person who needs to move to feel whole. I need to use my body in some way daily to feel truly well.
So today I did a 30-minute yoga class, and I feel much better now.
Going to get breakfast after I shower (I know it’s almost two. Bite me) then just relax.
It’s Saturday, let’s all just calm down.
Future me editing this: It’s now the 17th of December (don’t crucify me pls) and I’d have continued from here but I feel this is already long enough? So I’ll schedule this to post on Tuesday I think, then start another entry.
I apologize again for the long silence, I’m just a baby.
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